Forward This!

A true story by Josh and Karen Zarandona

Brenda was a young woman who was invited to go rock climbing. Although she was very scared, she went with her group to a tremendous granite cliff. In spite of her fear, she put on the gear, took hold of the rope, and started up the face of that rock.

Well, she got to a ledge where she could take a breather. As she was hanging on there, the safety rope snapped against Brenda’s eye and knocked out her contact lens.

Well, here she is, on a rock ledge, with hundreds of feet below her and hundreds of feet above her. Of course, she looked and looked and looked, hoping it had landed on the ledge, but it just wasn’t there.

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In the beginning, God created the bit. And the bit was a zero.

On the first day, he toggled the 0 to 1, and the Universe was. (In those days, bootstrap loaders were simple, and “active low” signals didn’t yet exist.)

On the second day, God’s boss wanted a demo, and tried to read the bit. This being volatile memory, the bit reverted to a 0. And the universe wasn’t. God learned the importance of backups and memory refresh, and spent the rest of the day (and his first all-nighter) reinstalling the universe.

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GOD: Angels, do you know what I was just thinking about?

ANGELS: What were you thinking about?

GOD: Christians seem to have forgotten what kind of power they have available and the devil keeps on deceiving them!

ANGELS: God, exactly what are you driving at?

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The man whispered, “God, speak to me.”
And a meadowlark sang. But, the man did not hear.

So the man yelled, “God, speak to me”.
And the thunder rolled across the sky. But, the man did not listen.

The man looked around and said, “God let me see you.”
And a star shined brightly. But the man did not see.

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A mother and her daughter were at the gynecologist’s office. The mother asked the doctor to examine her daughter.

“She has been having some strange symptoms and I’m worried about her,” the mother said.

The doctor examined the daughter carefully and then announced, “Madam, I believe your daughter is pregnant.”

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